WHAT YOUR DENTAL HYGIENIST IS THINKING WHEN..

Inspired by many. They know who they are.
  1. You say, "I didn't brush/floss this morning because I figured that's what you were doing".
    💭That's really disgusting. Why would anyone think I want to dig your bagel or last night's ribs, out of your already, plaque-ridden teeth. Have a little pride, for godsake!
  2. You turn your head away from me instead of toward me. Repeatedly.
    💭Thank you for making this entire process significantly harder, because I can't think of anything my back would enjoy more than leaning over you for 45 minutes.
  3. You ask me to demonstrate how to use a plastic toothpick. (I assure you, I'm not making this up).
    💭I'm certain this is self explanatory.
  4. You are annoyed that you're uncomfortable.
    💭We've had HOW many discussions about how this is preventable?
  5. You're talking incessantly while I'm trying to work INSIDE your mouth.
    💭I really hope I don't poke you with this sharp instrument, but hey, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  6. You tell me things I have no business knowing.
    💭I'm not sure why I need to know you cheated on your wife, or you don't have a retirement plan..
  7. You're chronically late to your appointment.
    💭It wasn't a "suggested time" and now I will be playing catch up all day, thanks.
  8. You fall asleep.
    💭My fingers are in there, you know..
  9. You ask, do I really need to have _______done?
    💭No, of course not! We just like to play around with a little insurance fraud now and then!
  10. You smell like raw onions, garlic, alcohol/weed or just morning breath.
    💭Holy hell, this mask is never keeping that out.
  11. We have the SAME conversation every time I see you.
    💭I can't do this again.
  12. You don't bother to show up.
    💭I have a dozen people on a list that would have appreciated this appointment, not cool.
  13. You squirm and wince while I'm trying to give you some Novocain.
    💭You know that I know, those tattoos you have, required a needle, right?🙄
  14. You walk in to my room as I'm setting up and ask, "are you ready for me?"
    💭I know where you are.
  15. You huff and puff because you had to wait on me for a few minutes.
    💭This is a dental practice, not unlike your doctor's office, and we have patient emergencies too. Also, the vast majority of the time, I'm running behind because YOU were late and threw off the whole schedule.
  16. You tell me you're losing your insurance, so "you won't be seeing me much"🤔
    💭So, you're just going to stop getting preventive dental care, bc your insurance no longer pays for it? I understand if it's b/w taking care of your teeth and groceries..(but most of the time I hear this, I've just heard about your European vacation and I know you drive a nicer car than I do)!
  17. You tell me a dirty joke.
    💭This better actually be funny or I AM going to make you bleed.