I'VE SPENT THE LAST 36 HOURS HIDING IN A STORM DRAIN! BUT AT LEAST I'M FREE!

  1. I escaped prison with my cell mate Kyle during the "Cats" performance/prison riot on Monday night!
  2. Kyle, as it turns out, is a little weird. He told me after we escaped that he was the reincarnation of Jesus Christ and that the only way for me to go to heaven is for me to give him my skin!
  3. The police have come close to us multiple times, but they still haven't found us! And boy, those police dogs sure are tenacious!
  4. I have to find a way to get home in time for Thanksgiving! It just won't be the same in the house with Christine missing and me on the run. The kids wouldn't know what to make of it!