We put on our version of "Cats" tonight (I played Bustopher Jones!), but before the second act, a full on prison riot/race war broke out!
  1. Carbucketty and Skimbleshanks jumped Jellylorum during "The Old Gumbie Cat" and started stabbing the hell out of him with a sharpened toothbrush!
  2. The guards flooded in, but MS-13, who were playing the chorus cats, started beating them with weights wrapped in pillow cases!
  3. Mr. Mistoffelees was stomped to death after trying to leap onto Grizabella's back! I didn't know the human body had that much blood in it!
  4. Johnny Crimefingers' stash of prison wine exploded, and now there's a hole in the side of the prison!
  5. My cellmate Kyle and I are going to make a break for it. Christine, I'm coming sweetie!