THE NICE PEOPLE AT MENARDS OFFERED ME $8 IN NAILS TO WRITE SOMETHING ABOUT THEM!
- •If you know me, you know how much I love @menards brand hardware stores! They have everything you could ever need!
- •When I was on the run after being framed for murdering my wife, there were two things I missed more than anything else: Christine, and the warm feeling I get whenever I walk into a Menards store!
- •Christmas is my favorite time of year, and you can get everything you need at Menards! There are inflatable Santas, inflatable snowmen, heck, there's even an inflatable manger scene!
- •You want tools? Menards has you covered! Everything from hammers and socket wrenches to carpet cleaners and jackhammers!
- •I feel like I'm obligated to tell you folks that my daughter Michelle is no longer allowed in Menards stores nationwide after driving a riding mower over a bunch of fluorescent light bulbs last December while screaming. "Santa isn't real!" Still, I love the place!