WHAT'S THAT NOISE?

Ranked in order of probability.
  1. 1.
    A serial killer.
  2. 2.
    Not a serial killer yet, but a wannabe who thought I'd be an easy target just to get his feet wet in the industry.
  3. 3.
    A killer who has no aspirations of being serial but saw me at the store and was like, "oh I'd like to kill that."
  4. 4.
    A burglar who thinks no one is home but will have no qualms in killing me when he finds me here.
  5. 5.
    A burglar who won't want to kill me but will kill me accidentally when I startle him.
  6. 6.
    Someone who is in love with me and knows no other way to express his love except to kill me.
  7. 7.
    Someone who is in love with me and is here to express that love "Say Anything" style.
  8. 8.
    The cat.
  9. 9.
    The wind.
  10. 10.
    Nothing.