HILARIOUS THINGS MY GRANDMA HAS SAID/DONE

  1. On a post-it note stuck to a $5 bill: "This is for soup or ice cream."
  2. Re: a charity fashion show her friends organized: "I was not asked to model."
  3. "The less you hear what people say about you the better... And I do have trouble hearing."
  4. Sent me a Valentine's Day card and enclosed pictures of her bowling teammate's pet monkey.
  5. "HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!!!!" Said while sitting at the table alone with a large glass of wine half an hour before we're ready to eat while the rest of us are running around like crazy in the kitchen
  6. Told three of her grandchildren to write HER into THEIR wills
  7. "You speak so much more eloquently... Since you went to school."
  8. Insisted on buying us nachos and soda at the bowling alley at 11am.
  9. Southern accent (she is not southern)
  10. "Why did God create alligators??" Said in a tone of great indignation