THINGS I AM NOT GOING TO LIST ON MY MATCH.COM PROFILE

For some reason, I signed up for match.com. Mostly, I suspect this is because I don't want to do homework and have run out of procrastination options. At any rate, these are the wackier things that I'm not likely to share until a little further into a relationship.
  1. I travel with an inflatable dinosaur.
    His name is Spot. He has his own Instagram and Twitter accounts.
  2. I am wildly insecure about my body.
    Leftover body dysmorphia. I'm super sensitive when it comes to comments about my body and how people interact with my body.
  3. I am a Disney fanatic.
    I don't need whoever I'm dating to be a fanatic as well. This is not a deal breaker. The deal breaker is judging me for taking my yearly sister trip to Disney.
  4. I spend most of my paycheck on books.
    Yeah, yeah, the library is free. Except when you forget to return things and wind up paying eight billion dollars in fines. I figure I'm saving money by just buying them outright. This is a picture of an actual book that is probably two months overdue.
  5. I have a love affair with Diet Coke.
    It will probably always be my first love. @justjills knows this well enough that she bought me a case of it for my birthday. It was the perfect gift and lasted me approximately two days.
  6. I am a total dork.
    And I own it. Picture = case in point.
  7. I will probably destroy you in trivia and word games.
    Insecure men need not apply. Men who can give me a run for my money most definitely should.