How I Deal With Anger

This list is probably a little psychotic
  1. I eat carrots
    I find the the chewing really calms me down. And not baby carrots, that's some weak shit. I need the regular ones.
  2. Drive
    To the nearest McDonald's
  3. Sharpen my knives
    I watched my grandma do this a lot when she was angry, probably not the healthiest option...but it works.
  4. Exercise
    I'll go to spinning class or get on a bike machine and pretend I'm on my way to kill whoever I'm mad at
  5. Take a cold shower
    I will do this if my carrot eating has not calmed me, if I am still angry after the shower I will sharpen my knives. If all else fails, then I'm off to the gym.