It all started with Dungeons & Dragons. I filled in a couple of helpful hints if you're a dingus who knows nothing about the game.
  1. Back in my post-college days, some friends and I began doing something we had wanted to do for Y E A R S.
  2. We started playing Dungeons & Dragons.
    Every Tuesday night. None of us had ever played before and we were figuring it out along the way and having a blast.
  3. Our group was myself, my best friend, my other pretty good friend, a coworker (our DM), and two of my coworker's friends.
    DM stands for Dungeon Master, ya dingus.
  4. I hadn't met my coworker's friends prior to playing DnD. One of them was the only other girl who played; her name was Rachel & she was COOL.
  5. The other was a guy named Alex and he was LESS COOL.
    Alex was the guy who never broke character, intentionally wasted all of our time because he thought it was funny, and thought he was really good in combat but he wasn't really that good. He also had pretty bad hygiene.
  6. One week after DnD, Alex followed me to my car. I tried to leave quickly but he tapped on my window, so I rolled it down.
    Keys were in the ignition. Hands at 10 and 2.
  7. Alex says "I have one more roll I need to make tonight"
    I say "uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"
  8. Alex says "I need to roll a charisma check to see if I can take you to dinner"
    I say "uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"
  9. Alex proceeds to ACTUALLY ROLL A D20 ON THE ROOF OF MY CAR.
    (a d20 is dice, ya dingus)
  10. Alex says "I rolled an 11, but I don't know what kind of bonus I have"
    I say "uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"
  11. ...
    At least 45 seconds go by of me just making a weird "uhhhhh" noise, hands at 10 and 2 still.
  12. Alex says "soooo you can just let me know then?"
  13. I say "yeah sure!!!!" and DRIVE THE HECK AWAY
    and called my friend immediately to share what happened
  14. I sent Alex a text later that night telling him I was flattered but not interested
    sorry bout it 💅🏼
  15. The End
    full disclosure, if this had come from somebody less annoying in DnD/life I may have considered it endearing. Either way it's a fun story to tell.