Skills/accomplishments That Would Be Inappropriate to List on a Resume

Things I'm sad to admit are my skills/accomplishments in my lifetime, and that I wish translated to the workforce
  1. That I've caught all 150 Pokemon.
  2. That I can quote copious amounts of Star Wars the Original Trilogy dialogue.
  3. That I've successfully stolen a first kiss away from some other woman's boyfriend.
  4. That I finished both mine and my brother's Grand Slam meals at Denny's.
  5. That I underwent a dare to eat nothing but baby food for 3 whole days.
  6. That I came up with the idea of a nasal tampon.
  7. That I can perform a rainbow kick in soccer.
  8. That I have amazing model-esque hands.
  9. That I've discovered that after you pick your belly lint, your finger smells funny.