MY POTENTIAL 'REAL HOUSEWIVES' OPENING CREDITS PHRASES 📂
Inspired by @TJ
- •I have a big heart and a hundred travel-size face soaps and creams (because I do Birchbox).
- •Popular culture is my life, and I'm swiftly losing interest in popular culture.
- •Matthew McConaughey talking slowly about big concepts? NO THANKS.
- •Yes I WILL have another. And then could you settle me up? It's Holmes. Holmes. H.
- •I mean, two famous children are fighting with each other on Snapchat or whatever and I'm supposed to have an opinion on it? Just. I'm sorry. No.
- •I get allergic smelling hay.
- •Let me clear off my passenger seat. I know; I DO drink a lot of bottled water.
- •"Fir?" Come on, autocorrect. When have I EVER texted about a tree?
- •I give to the needy, and not the greedy. Mm-hm that's right.
- •Did you turn into one of those people you pitied when you were younger? I did, and I TRY MY BEST NOT TO DWELL ON IT.