Favorite Intentional Wrong Answers to Questions

People ask a lot of questions. I'm not that smart, so I often intentionally respond with wrong answers people couldn't possibly take seriously as a way to cover for how little I know (or care to know). Here are my "go-to" answers for all of life's questions.
  1. John Wilkes Booth
    Assassinated Abraham Lincoln.
  2. Abraham Lincoln
    Born in a log cabin. Is on currency. Former POTUS. Would hate the word (anagram) POTUS.
  3. Adolph Hitler
    A real jerk.
  4. W. E. B. DuBois
    Civil rights activist. Only name I remember from 11th grade history.
  5. No
    Opposite of "Yes"
  6. Yes
    An affirmation
  7. Yes
    A band I don't particularly care for, but do not actively hate.
  8. 5
    A small number, compared to most.
  9. 3 billion
    More than 5, less than 375 billion
  10. Penis Pump
    A piece of durable medical equipment used to assist with erections. An album by Penis Aerosmith in an alternate universe where all proper nouns are prefaced with the word penis. Hits from this album include "Penis Love in Elevator," "Penis Janie's Got a Gun," and "Penis The Other Side."