REGRETTABLE MOVIES I SAW ON DATES IN HIGH SCHOOL

  1. Howard the Duck
  2. Crocodile Dundee 2
    My exhaustion with The Dark Knight can be directly traced back to this film's numerous dramatic climaxes.
  3. Sweet Liberty
    Alan Alda's masterpiece
  4. Big Top Pee Wee
  5. Bad Dreams
    Late-80s horror movie. "Sweet Child O' Mine" played over the credits, and I was really into Guns n Roses at the time. This did not make it a better movie, though.
  6. Armed & Dangerous
    With John Candy and Eugene Levy. Terrible.
  7. Cocktail
    Not a date, but I saw this with two female friends. Afterward, we were in a terrible car crash! Which was still a better time than Cocktail.
  8. Hellraiser
    Note: was 17. Girl cancelled on our first date at last minute. Went and saw movie anyway. Afterward, saw girl in a carload of her friends leaving the theater's parking garage. There was startled, horrified eye contact. But technically we *were* at the movie together. P.S. This story still mortifies me.