A SERIES OF TEXTS I'VE SENT TO EX-BOYFRIENDS THAT I'VE IMMEDIATELY REGRETTED SENDING

The sad thing is too many of them were sent sober
  1. First text: I hope you're good. Second text: I mean well because you know adverbs. Third text: I hope you're well.
  2. I miss the way you say my name
  3. I'm a little confused about your girlfriend's ethnicity
  4. I wore my good bra and you didn't even get to take it off
  5. I hope you have to live in Ohio forever
    Actually don't regret that one
  6. I would have been a really good first wife to you
  7. I know we haven't talked in a while but I just really wanted to be the one to tell you they're making a show called "girl meets world"
  8. Kiss your cat goodbye for me
  9. This is awkward but were you ever an extra in a movie?
  10. You make everything hurt and its really cold outside and I'm letting you go but you can't ever leave
  11. I'm sorry I accidentally followed you on tumblr. But why do you have a tumblr that's filled with "did you know?" posts.
  12. See you later alligator (like goodbye, like we're done now)
  13. Hey, I'm here!
  14. Lol sorry wrong person
  15. actually I lied. Not wrong person. I did that on purpose.