A SERIES OF TEXTS I'VE SENT TO EX-BOYFRIENDS THAT I'VE IMMEDIATELY REGRETTED SENDING
The sad thing is too many of them were sent sober
- •First text: I hope you're good. Second text: I mean well because you know adverbs. Third text: I hope you're well.
- •I miss the way you say my name
- •I'm a little confused about your girlfriend's ethnicity
- •I wore my good bra and you didn't even get to take it off
- •I hope you have to live in Ohio foreverActually don't regret that one
- •I would have been a really good first wife to you
- •I know we haven't talked in a while but I just really wanted to be the one to tell you they're making a show called "girl meets world"
- •Kiss your cat goodbye for me
- •This is awkward but were you ever an extra in a movie?
- •You make everything hurt and its really cold outside and I'm letting you go but you can't ever leave
- •I'm sorry I accidentally followed you on tumblr. But why do you have a tumblr that's filled with "did you know?" posts.
- •See you later alligator (like goodbye, like we're done now)
- •Hey, I'm here!
- •Lol sorry wrong person
- •actually I lied. Not wrong person. I did that on purpose.