Things my fitness coach said to me today.

I started a class called Crush. I have 1% muscle tone, my arms have -22%. I'm made of breadsticks and my heart pumps more wine than blood in my veins.
  1. Get freaky!!
    In reference to some humpy move we did. I've learned these humpy moves and rowing are like 2 of the best things you can do. And I'm good at them for whatever reason. Gold star ⭐️ for humping.
  2. Those aren't the worst squats I've seen. They are equal to the worst squats I've seen.
    I don't know how to booty pop properly. Please help me booty poppers. I am picturing every person in the gym asking themselves WTF¿?when they glance over and see me do this. And I did like 100 today. F- on squats 🥉
  3. Christy, your heart rate went in the red zone and we haven't started the push ups yet.
    Apparently the mention of push ups gives me anxiety. He's going to have to learn me. 📈Also he gave me a tall box to do push ups on because I'm an amateur.
  4. This will be ongoing as I'm sure I haven't hit mastery level on day 2.