Things My Mom Said to Me on the Phone Just Now

Hastily transcribed
  1. On her sciatic nerve
    If I can't go shopping i know something's wrong. I just can't fall again. At least Rod doesn't care if I don't do the dishes.
  2. Movie recommendation #1
    I just watched this movie Cake with Jennifer Aniston. She won an Oscar for it. She wore no makeup
  3. Movie recommendation #2
    I also saw Black and White with Kevin Costner. It just goes to show, love is love. It doesn't matter if you're black or white. I cried and cried.
  4. On her baking prowess
    Lindsay said she went to the bakery Oprah goes to and the muffins were so dry. My muffins are moist.
  5. On legalized marijuana
    Charlotte's Web is a special pot plant for kids who have seizures. I don't smoke pot or drink alcohol, but I think people should
  6. On legalized marijuana #2
    They're probably going to have to get a new breathalyzer. I never liked pot. Never sat around and drank all day. I'm glad me and Rod don't do nothing.
  7. On what her husband is reading
    Lindsay sent him books on spirituality. There are people that are 1000s of years old. They live in the high mountains of India. No one has ever seen them. they can make things appear and disappear. I believe it. He's reading American Sniper