STUPID THINGS MY CAT DOES
I have a garbage cat.
- •Sleeps on his back with his feet in the air like he's been shot
- •Tries to chew on my toenails
- •Plays fetch
- •Climbs in the refrigerator every time I open the door
- •Falls off the kitchen table every time he tries to jump onto it
- •Runs laps around the apartment like he's training for the Olympics
- •Sticks his entire head in my shoes as soon as I take them off
- •Pries open the sealed bucket of cat food and gorges himself
- •Uses my chest as a springboard
- •Blocks the air conditioner during the summer
- •Yells at my roommate
- •Yells at me
- •Yells at the shower
- •Yells at the TV
- •Yells at me at 5 a.m.
- •Yells at the automatic cat feeder I bought on Amazon to keep him from yelling at me at 5 a.m.
- •Tries to chew on electrical cords
- •Drools on my pillow