THINGS I LEARNED ABOUT MYSELF BY GOING THROUGH MY STATUS UPDATES OVER THE LAST DECADE

Reading through my Facebook and Twitter posts over the last 10 years, I realize I have not remotely evolved as a human being. Here's what I learned about me according to me...
  1. I'm tired all the time. All the time.
  2. I sometimes express myself through song lyrics
  3. I subliminally try to make all my exes feel like shit by talking about how many plans I have
  4. I hate life and when I don't hate life I think I suck at it
  5. I'm lazy and I waste time (especially on the internet)
  6. I alternate between great confidence and total defeat when it comes to my musical prospects
  7. I make questionable dietary choices
  8. I like a good pun every now and then.
  9. I act shocked when something good happens to me, as if it is the most unlikely thing and not a constant reality since I am a totally privileged human being.
  10. I make self-aware statements that are not remotely meaningful because I continue doing and subsequently post about doing the same shit
  11. I love my dog.
  12. I'd include examples for all of these but see number 5 on the list