The Thoughts of a Spring Breaker Whose Glow Stick Doesn't Seem to Be Working

  1. "FORT LAUDERDALE LESSSS GOOOOOOOO!"
  2. Fists up, music blaring, surrounded by my boys.
  3. Snag that funnel, Danny. This is the youngest you're ever going to be.
  4. We're never going to die.
  5. Where's Melissa? I want Melissa to see how much fun I'm having.
  6. This DJ IS KILLING IT.
  7. "This DJ IS KILLING IT!"
  8. Pauly can't hear me.
  9. "I SAID THE MUSIC IS GOOD!"
  10. God damn, I feel so great. This is amazing. Every day should be like this. So glad Pauly convinced me to come.
  11. Where are the girls? Melissa said the girls would be down half an hour ago. I wanna party with Melissa. She's been so fun this whole trip.
  12. "RICKY, BROTHER, LET'S TAKE A SHOT."
  13. What the hell is Ricky motioning to?
  14. "MY GLOWSTICK NECKLACE?! YEAH DUDE, IT'S FIRE, RIGHT?"
  15. Oh, wait.
  16. It's not lighting up.
  17. That's weird.
  18. Ok, take the shot with Ricky.
  19. "TO SPRING BREAK, BITCHES!"
  20. Break off a different part of the glow stick. That's what makes it light up.
  21. It's, like, kinda lit now?
  22. I'm so drunk.
  23. Take it off, and put it near the floor where it's darker. See if it's lit up.
  24. I think it's supposed to be brighter, right?
  25. Keep dancing, Danny. Never stop.
  26. Ok, hands up, but also try to figure out this glow stick situation.
  27. Maybe I can find a new one on the floor.
  28. Forget the glow stick, Danny. You're in Florida with your best college friends. SENIORS, MAN.
  29. I need a glow stick. Pauly has one around his neck and one around his head.
  30. Plus I'm not even wearing a tank top.
  31. "HELL YEAH, MORE SHOTS. TO IMMORTALITY!"
  32. Find a glow stick before Melissa and the girls show up.
  33. Carrie will probably have extra glow sticks. I could try to find her first.
  34. Just find one on the ground. It's spring break. The ground is composed of beer cans, glow sticks, and fliers for daytime Uncle Kracker concerts.
  35. I think I see one.
  36. Dance over.
  37. "WOO!"
  38. Great "WOO," Danny. Textbook "WOO."
  39. How does everyone know this song? It's just beats.
  40. I'm drunk and now it's in a bad way.
  41. Ok, there on the floor. Snag it, but don't fall.
  42. Oh no, I hit a guy's leg. He's going to try to fight me.
  43. "SHOTS, BRO? YEAH. SENIORS!"
  44. Ok, cool, me and that guy are cool, but someone grabbed the glow stick.
  45. Forget the glow stick, Danny. It's not important.
  46. Yes it is. Everyone else is going to have glow sticks.
  47. God, look at Ricky rave. I can't believe he's got a job lined up at Goldman Sachs.
  48. I have nothing lined up. Shouldn't have been a poetry major. I'm such an idiot.
  49. This is the last time any of us are going to party like this before the real world.
  50. I'm finding a glow stick.
  51. CARRIE!
  52. Dance over.
  53. "YO CARRIE! GOT ANY GLOWSTICKS?!"
  54. She can't hear me.
  55. "GLOW. STICKS. NO, I KNOW I HAVE ONE. IT'S NOT WORKING FOR SOME REASON."
  56. Carrie, just give me an extra glow stick.
  57. "YES, I TRIED BREAKING IT IN A DIFFERENT PLACE. NO. I DIDN'T FREEZE IT. IS THAT A THING? FREEZING THEM MAKES THEM BRIGHTER? ANYWAY, IT WAS A NEW ONE SO IT SHOULD HAVE WORKED."
  58. Damn it, Samantha is here.
  59. "Hey Sam."
  60. Sam is accusing me of freeloading off Carrie for glow sticks.
  61. No one wanted Sam here. She sucks.
  62. I should tell her that.
  63. No, Danny. Drunk.
  64. Ok.
  65. "WHERE'S MELISSA?"
  66. Melissa is dancing with a guy. Does that make me jealous?
  67. Yes.
  68. "WHERE?"
  69. Oh man, that guy has so many glow sticks.
  70. Carrie has no more glow sticks for me.
  71. Is there like a glow stick vendor? Probably, right?
  72. "SHOTS LATER? SHOTS LATER. BYE."
  73. Find a glow stick man.
  74. Oh, now Pauly and Ricky met up with Sam and Carrie and they are all dancing and glowing.
  75. I want to be glowing. I want to be invincible again.
  76. Oh no, there's Melissa. Don't let her see you emitting no light.
  77. "HEY MELISSA!"
  78. She's luminous.
  79. She's tugging me towards everyone.
  80. "YEAH I'LL JOIN THE GROUP IN A MINUTE."
  81. Just dance, Danny.
  82. You are with your people.
  83. Hey, maybe...
  84. If everyone around me is glowing... then I will glow too.
  85. Yeah.
  86. Jesus, I'm hammered.