1. the binocular decoy
    leave a pair of binoculars in front of the subject. once they discover them, they'll never suspect that you're spying on them with a second pair of binoculars
  2. the tarot parrot
    ask a tarot card reader to watch your parrot for a few minutes. when the subject gets their tarot read, your parrot will hear everything and be able to say it back to you.
  3. the itchy ear (and rest of the body)
    coat a room with itch-spray. now, everyone who enters the room will begin scratching their ears (along with the rest of their bodies) like crazy. this will give you a perfect cover to hold your finger up to your ear (which is connected to a monitor of what the subject saying) and listen in.
  4. the lawnmower service
    start a small lawn mowing business. after you've established a decent number of clients, approach the subject and offer to mow their lawn. once they've unlocked their gate and invited you into the backyard, you're free to find out what the subject is hiding in the grass
  5. the camera