THINGS I KNOW TO BE TRUE

  1. I've never used algebra as an adult.
  2. Saran Wrap is my enemy
  3. People who say "The customer is always right", have never worked in customer service.
  4. Mosquitoes love me more than anyone else in the world.
  5. People who drink decaf coffee are not to be trusted.
  6. Guacamole costs extra.
  7. "In Your Eyes" by Peter Gabriel is the best song ever written.
  8. Making lists is fun.
  9. I should be sleeping right now.
  10. This concludes my list of things I know to be true.