1. Buy a tuxedo, a top hat, a monocle, and a cane. And wear them everywhere every day.
  2. Become one of the investors on Shark Tank, then just sit there, ridicule people, and tell them their inventions are not worthy of my money.
  3. Change my name to Thurston Howell IV, and perhaps take a 3hour boat tour.
  4. Track down my old college roommate and pay him back that twenty bucks I've owed him since '93.
  5. Splurge and add guacamole to my Chipotle burrito.