THREE HAPPY MOMENTS FROM TODAY

  1. 1. That moment I ordered a biscuit and hash browns for breakfast and the Latina who took my order asked me if I wanted "any ketches or yelly". It's an adorable mispronunciation, unless you work with her all morning every morning probably.
    Mmm... Grape yelly...
  2. 2. That moment when one of my more socially awkward students really insistently wanted to tell me (and, by proxy, any other responsible parties) thank you for letting them dissect sheep hearts. Like she made me acknowledge it rather than brush it off.
    Side note: She has recently taken to trying to make me feel uncomfortable by walking up to me and asking me stupid questions lighting-round style and then going "Awkwaaaaard..." after I answer them all straight-faced without acknowledging that she's obviously being weird as hell.
  3. 3. That moment my girlfriend and I developed a Helen Keller conspiracy theory over dinner then my two best friends chimed in with their takes on it without ever stopping to ask the obvious: "Why the fuck are you asking us this?"
  4. Bonus: As if it wasn't inappropriate enough to pose the question, "Guys I hope this is just a crazy fleeting irrational concern... but what if the whole Helen Keller thing was just one of history's great hoaxes?"