There is a movie, the full thing is on YouTube, that deserves to be in the same conversation as The Room, Troll 2, Birdemic, Samurai Cop, etc, etc. It is called Contemporary Gladiator (1989). The writer, director, star of CG uploaded the movie in full to his own YouTube account. His name is Anthony Amp Elmore. He sells carpet.
  1. The movie is Amp's life story about how he got into the world of "full-contact karate kickboxing" as an African-American youth from Memphis.
  2. Real life Amp who is prob in his 40s plays himself as a teenager so he's actually older than the actors playing his parents at one point. But then he cuts in actual real fight scenes from when he was in his 20s so his age jumps around nonstop.
  3. There is an entire dinner scene where every character around the table gets a two minute speech about their version of the American Dream and each includes at least one use of the phrase "and another thing."
  4. Amp's karate teacher beats him up and breaks his trophy bc he goes out and wins a tournament even though his teacher has strictly forbidden them from using their fighting competitively.
  5. Amp's best friend is the Kingfish, a character that is a combination of Don King and '70s Al Sharpton who loves booze and women. But really all he wants to do is sing the national anthem.
  6. There are at least five fights in here that could and should have been cut out but weren't and are a major reason why this is so terribly good.
  7. Based on his real life, Amp also works as a carpenter salesman, installing lots of carpet throughout the movie.
  8. Amp's delivery of dialogue can only be described as Andre the Giant meets Sylvester Stallone.
  9. Like seriously this needs to have screenings where people throw carpet squares and dance in the aisles and break their knuckles on the floor of the theater. How do we make this happen? @angusisley @troniks @bjnovak @tothemaxxx @fisackerly @richardrushfield
  10. If you've never seen this you have to watch it:
  11. The electrifying saga of the world's super heavyweight kickboxing champion!
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    Suggested by @phil