YOU THINK DATING SUCKS? IMAGINE BEING A SOCK

  1. Socks don't even have the OPTION of dating
  2. Even if they did, their identical twin is always right there, spoiling any chance for privacy
  3. Also, their job sucks. They work hard as foot assistants, but shoes get all the credit
  4. Finally, on top of it all, creepy guys often talk about using them to masturbate
  5. Personally, I think it's just talk. The texture of a sock seems totally wrong for that kind of thing
  6. Still, gotta be a bummer having those rumors out there
  7. Anyway, be nice to socks.
  8. They deserve a little respect, for God's sake
  9. Maybe set them up with a nice stocking or something
  10. Socks need love, too