1. 👦🏽 "You mean penises?"
  2. 👩🏻 "No, I mean private detectives."
  3. 👦🏽 "Penises are private."
  4. 👩🏻 "But they are not detectives."
  5. 👦🏽👩🏻 "😂😂"
  6. ____________
  7. Yes, I did consider "private dicks". It made me laugh. And I did mention how funny it was that there is a penis synonym that means detective. But I exercised some rare restraint and didn't tell him what the word was — despite his numerous attempts.
  8. Android users: please excuse the weird dots indicating skin color. Android developers: come on, now.