ISSUES I'M GONNA HAVE ON THIS FLIGHT

  1. My kids are on it. They're needy and don't give daddy any peace
  2. The dude sitting next to me is enormous
    I am in an aisle directly across from my kids/wife. Huge dude (who is eating a gigantic sandwich, which will only enlarge him further) is sitting in the middle. Terrible for him, still also bad for me. Southwest has some serious UX issues.
  3. This baby behind me is fucking losing it
    We are still on the ground
  4. We spent so much time packing that none of us have eaten
    Spare any of that sandwich, huge dude?
  5. To drink or not to drink
    It's noon, BUT, I'm on a plane, BUT I'm with my kids. BUTTTT It's not like I'm driving when we get to Denver
  6. Old chatty ladies behind me
    They're talking loudly...LOUDLY about apps. It's like a somehow more grating version of fixing your mom's computer
  7. The lady in front of me has gross legs
    Mean. True. Sorry.
  8. I hate flying.
    Xoxo listers!