THINGS THAT SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF ME

  1. My kids
    I can't even look at them without feeling my own mortality and recognizing how perfect they are and, in stark contrast, how imperfect I am and how inevitably I'm gonna fuck them up.
  2. Heights
    I have a dream where I'm clutching a thin ledge waaaay above ground at least once a week
  3. Cancer
    You know what I'm talking about
  4. My impulses
    I'm an asshole. Im not very nice, im very mean to myself and my soul. I would bet that people close to me think I'm killing myself and they probably don't care because they probably think I'm a dick
  5. Just writing this list
    It's scary
  6. ISIS
    Well, not ISIS per se, but any pure cruel evil like that. This goes back to my kids. I hate that they live in a world where people gleefully kill and torture. And yes, I recognize that ISIS exists as a direct counterpoint to a shitty, cruel, bloody foreign policy. I got it. You know what I mean
  7. Being alone
    I need people so badly. My family is just so sweet. I can't even finish this one. Ugh
  8. Turbulence
    Intellectually, it doesn't bother me but viscerally, ugh.
  9. My kids
    This one can't be overstated so here it is again.
  10. That I'm actually not very talented or smart or good at anything and I'm just deluding myself
    Of course I'm deluding myself
  11. Does anyone want to get a beer?
    Suddenly I feel very small and lonely