Further proof I'm an old man

  1. I just got these new laces that let me slip my shoes on.
    They're called Hickies and they are pretty fantastic. They are comfortable and they stay on without feeling like I could kick them off. Also, no laces dangling. ✔️
  2. The shoes are new balance
    Because my dad said they were comfortable. ✔️
  3. I just stared down a car that drove by bumping loud music, slowly shaking my head.
    Not in my neighborhood punk. ✔️