Just go with me on this.
  1. Birch
    Static
    Just a punk teenager. smh
  2. Cherry
    Static
    In his 20s. Pretty full of himself.
  3. Oak
    Static
    34 years old exactly. Is finally "figuring things out".
  4. Hickory
    Static
    40s-50s. He's been around the block a few times.
  5. Walnut
    Static
    60s-70s. Set in his ways and kind of a curmudgeon.
  6. Mahogany
    Static
    80s+. Gives zero fucks. Grows where we wants. Also passes gas without realizing it and we're all supposed to pretend we didn't notice.