Nobody does these things better than me. Believe me

  1. Nobody does more for their mom in the hospital than me. Believe me
  2. Nobody likes East Carolina Vinegar based barbeque better than me. Believe me.
  3. Nobody bowled a 297 better while nearly having a panic attack in front of a crowd of 11 year old boys than me. Believe me.
  4. Nobody beat more original nintendo games as a kid between 1987 to 1993 than I did. Believe me.
  5. Nobody played basketball in late high school and early college without ever being on a team better than me. Believe me.
  6. Nobody is a better overall writer/actor/comedian/contortionist than me. Believe me.
  7. Nobody likes 80's movies ironically better than me. Believe me.
  8. No one else made their own fan club in high school with elected officials and newsletters better than me. Believe me.