THINGS OUR DOG WOULD SAY IF HE COULD TALK

  1. "Hardy, har, har. I flinched when you pretended to throw the ball. Real original."
  2. "But mooooooom, I just want to sniff his butt."
  3. "Just rub my tummy, goddammit."
  4. "Squirrel."
  5. "Stop watching 90210 and take me for a walk."
  6. "If I promise to decrease on the shedding, do you promise to not use the vacuum?"
  7. "Do I smell bacon?!"
  8. "Can I have some bacon? Just one piece! Just a crumb! C'mon!"
  9. "Goooood morning! Rise 'n shine! Lemme just stick my face in your face!"