Inspired by the classic list meme by @angusisley, we put to rest the eternal argument of which dessert is best. Who will win sweet victory? (Add your own in suggestions & points will be amended).
  1. PIE: comes in multiple forms, classic round pie pan style, tart, galette hand pie (which is best deep fried), mini-pielettes (hipster DIY folks), slab pie (country and potluck midwest folks)
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    Points 50
  2. CAKE: comes in multiple forms, sheet, layered, wedding (tiered), cupcake, bundt, tea, shortcake, cakepops, coffeecake.
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    Points 50
  3. PIE: can be made savory! Chicken pot pie, empanadas, mushroom galette, calzones, even PIZZA is sometimes erroneously called pie, etc.
    Points 30
  4. CAKE: Gross! Cannot be ever be made savory, unless it's for novelty/shock value. (No savory muffins do not count as savory cakes)
    Points 0
  5. PIE: Crust is flakey delicious if done well. Can be double crusted pie or crumb topped pie. Can have meringue on top.
    Points 30
  6. CAKE: Frosting, is usually just sweet butter flavored but can come in a variety of flavors if the cake is more fancy. Polarizing as some people view the cake as just a vehicle for frosting while others don't like frosting at all.
    Point: 20
  7. PIE: the all American dessert. As homemade as apple pie, the definitive Americana dessert of yesteryear. Served as desserts for Thanksgiving and 4th of July.
    Point: 30
  8. CAKE: childhood nostalgia of cupcake. Served at birthdays, anniversaries, going away parties and other personal milestone events.
    Point: 30
  9. PIE: nontraditional wedding dessert served by hipsters, country folk, and Pinterest savvy folks.
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    Point: 30
  10. CAKE: Classic wedding dessert. Tiered, decorated, the centerpiece with a cutting ceremony, the gross saving the top layer for the 1 year anniversary tradition, the smearing on each other's face if that's your thing.
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    Points: 50
  11. PIE: humble and common, pie is the people's dessert. You don't gussy up a pie, you serve a slice maybe with some ice cream and that's it.
    Point 40
  12. CAKE: as common as a homemade cupcake or as fancy as a tiered decorated wedding cake, as homespun as carrot cake or upscale as an opera cake, cake is extremely versatile and is comfortable in a t-shirt or tux.
    Point 60
  13. PIE: for beginners, moderately easy to make at home with store bought crust and pie filling. Occurs less often subsequently. Less options available.
    Point 20
  14. CAKE: for beginners, easy to make at home with a box mix and tub of frosting. Whole aisle of grocery store often dedicated to boxes and tubs.
    Point 30
  15. PIE: signature pie in movie is the teen comedy American Pie with a penis sized hole in the top.
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    Point: 10
  16. CAKE: signature cake in movie is the red velvet armadillo cake from Steel Magnolias
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    Point: 30
  17. PIE: quirky fictional televisions and movies with pie as a reoccurring theme include Waitress and Pushing Daisies.
    Point 30
  18. CAKE: subject of quirky reality shows including Ace of Cakes, Cupcake Wars, Last Cake Standing.
    Point 20
  19. PIE: American Pie, a classic song by Don McLean, with a subsequent subpar cover by Madonna
    Point 30, Don McLean version; (-10), Madonna version: total 20
  20. CAKE: carb heavy and empty calories but does not require refrigeration like pies often do.
    Point 10
  21. CAKE: an Alternative rock band which was most prolific during the late 90s to early 00s,
    Point 20
  22. PIE: Often retains perfect moistness and texture far longer than cake. You can kinda justify it being low carb?
    50 points.
    Suggested by @lilydiamond
  23. PIE: Should be docked an additional 15 points for the Brady Bunch cover of "American Pie," which is much, MUCH worse than Madonna's.
    Seriously, YouTube it. It's a train wreck.
    Suggested by @angusisley
  24. CAKE points: 320
  25. PIE points: 325
    Which is sad as there are two emojis for cake and none for pie. 🎂🍰