Every Upgrade Is Really a Downgrade

My friend Rita had a theory that once you upgrade to a better product, you can't go backwards. Which means you end up spending more money to attain satisfaction. Here are some examples. Add your own!
  1. Chocolate
    Once you've started eating the really good stuff it's hard to swallow the cheap waxy grocery store stuff.
  2. Coffee
    It's a one way trip. From instant to Folgers to Starbucks, to micro-roasted pour over its hard to go back to the grocery store stuff. Unless your grocery store sells local small batch roasted beans that is.
  3. Stereo equipment
    Little speakers and cheap headphones are fine until you start experiencing quality equipment. Then, all of sudden, you hear those subtle bass notes and little twinkly bits that you never heard before. The cheap stuff now sounds like your listening through two tin cans strung together.
  4. Wine
    Say goodbye to Two Buck Chuck once you start drinking decent everyday wine. Suddenly weeknight quaffable bottle goes from $7 to $15 to $25 or more. FYI this is never ending.
  5. Smart phone
    What, you're going to go back to pressing the number 2 button three times to get the letter "F" when you text? I don't think so.
  6. Booze
    Cheap rotgut vodka? No thank you. Top shelf tequila. Hello! Say goodbye to bottom shelf grocery store booze.
  7. Mattress
    Sure you slept on a futon in college. Then you bought your bed at IKEA for your first post-college apartment. But once you start upgrading to nice mattresses your back will never forgive you if you downgrade back to the IKEA Sultan Hurva.
  8. High speed internet
    Yeah, because dial-up is ever going to happen again. But even with high speed there's high speed and there's HIGH speed. Slow internet is terrible....
  9. Bread
    Crusty sourdough from that artisan bakery across town or Wonder Bread? No question.
  10. Bedsheets
    Itchy scratchy off brand poly-cotton sheets? Or 1000 thread count Egyptian cotton? Damn you and your soft cloud-like caress on my bare skin.
  11. Toilet Paper
    Once you go to double-ply with a fabric-like softness you can't go back to stealing extra rolls from Chocolatè on C Street like you did in college. (You know you did it too.)
    Suggested by   @donnie