Signs That I Am an Aging Homosexual
@AJ and I went out to celebrate pride & the SCOTUS ruling this weekend! Here are snipbits of our conversation during our various walkabouts over the weekend. This list is empirical evidence that we are old.
- 1."We're walking in the direction of the loud music. Let's turn around."Actually every direction headed toward loud music but we apparently ventured too close to one of the street stages when @AJ said it.
- 2."There should be more drag queens here."My theory was we got to the street party too early. The queens were still getting ready. But where was the fabulous? It was so bland and corporate.
- 3."All these people in our park! I want to shake my fist at them and tell them 'Get off my lawn!'"I live 1 block away from Dolores Park. I actually do consider it my lawn. And I really did say this to @AJ. (And I kind of meant it.)
- 4."I'm enjoying this music. But I don't need to be any closer."We were 2 city blocks away from the stage. It was loud enough for us.
- 5."Why is everyone here 12 year old?"TBH they were probably closer to 18 to 23 but a lot looked like they hadn't quite hit puberty yet. Or maybe they were just butch baby lesbians? I can't tell anymore.
- 6."I don't understand what they are protesting. I want their chants to be more succinct and to the point. It just sounds so vague."They were chanting "Stonewall was a riot!" Which we all know it was? But what are they trying to say? It was all very confusing to both of us. The group chanting also had a vague sign with letters I didn't understand "QITPOC" which I later googled and found stood for queer, intersex, trans people of color. I wish they would have at least written that on the sign. I didn't have a clue what those letters meant.
- 7."Do you want to go through the crowd or on the empty closed off street?"We picked this street. In my youth I would have picked the crowd.
- 8."Where's the dyke march? Did we miss it? Oh wait there it is. It's a block away. Should we go and watch?"We seriously had to ask if we should walk a whole block to watch the march. And when we finally decided to go and watch, it had already ended. #SadTrombone
- 9."I don't want to wait in line for that swag. It's only a cheap t-shirt."Young me would have waited in line.
- 10."It's all food booths and corporate sponsors!"The ultimate "grandpa" comment about pride. I might as well shake me my cane at those damn kids!
- 11."It's so loud."This was a reoccurring theme apparently. So much so I had to mention it here 3 times.
- 12."$10 for meat on a stick?!? I remember when it was only $5!"So actually THIS is the ultimate grandpa statement. When you start talking about "the old days" and how cheap everything used to be...
- 13."Do you want hang out more or go home?"We went home. After walking about for 45 minutes.
- 14."Did you want to meet up later with them and get drink in the Castro?" "No, let's just go home and make the fried chicken we talked about."@AJ has really been looking forward to our Fried Chicken Sunday all day...