Things Jews & Asians Have in Common

Inspired by @gabimoskowitz' Yiddish word list.
  1. 1.
    Chinese food.
    The Jews and the Asians love their Chinese-American food. Strangely, this is not reciprocal. I love me some matzo ball soup & latkes but most Asians aren't as invested in the same way Jewish people are with Chinese food. Their loss I guess.
  2. 2.
    Parental guilt.
    From having to practice the piano to doing homework to dating a nice boy or girl within their culture, guilt is the biggest motivator. This continues into adulthood with having kids and then how you should be raising the kids.
  3. 3.
    Must date within their culture.
    Parents may claim that all they want for their child is to be happy when they grow up. But to be truly happy, the Jewish child must marry a nice Jewish boy/girl and the Asian must marry a nice Asian boy/girl (preferably one of the same ethnicity background but there is some leeway). I actually think my parents were more concerned that I dated white boys than I was gay. (They've come to accept my partner now though).
  4. 4.
    Parents really want you to grow up into a doctor. Or marry one.
    Second preference for career is lawyer for Jewish and engineer for Asians. Teaching, while a noble profession, is lower on the list but still acceptable though often it is only acceptable if in conjunction with the spouse having one of the more desirable careers. Not acceptable careers include anything in performing arts or visual arts (though, strangely nearly every Asian is forced to take piano and violin lessons growing up; mixed messages much mom?).
  5. 5.
    Works on Christmas.
    Pretty much any job that requires work on Christmas (Emergency room staff for instance) will be filled with Jews and Asians. It's double pay!
  6. 6.
    Goes to the movies in Christmas Day.
    If you aren't working (see #5) you go and get Chinese food (see #1) and then go the movies. What else is there to do on Christmas Day?
  7. 7.
    Dumplings
    Jews have kreplach, Asians have an entire world of dumplings. But at the end of the day, we both love tasty fillings with noodle exteriors.
    Suggested by   @gabimoskowitz