10 HALLOWEEN THOUGHTS ON THE SUBWAY

Think 3pm.
  1. That woman carrying a huge red cello isn't holding on to anything, and if she falls she'll crush that child
  2. Dude in a grey peacoat slowly suffocating me in this corner, your class ring is close enough to my face to read. Please stop
  3. Let's count the strollers. There are four, and everybody is upset about it
  4. Kind young man just offered his seat to an older gentleman, who rejected it and said he wasn't old? Okay
  5. Why is that man trying on adidas clothing on the subway? No, go back, the red sweater looked good
  6. The girl wearing rainbow platform shoes looks like she literally doesn't care about anything. Also I can see myself in her purple mirrored aviators
  7. There are a lot of people in sports team clothing but not a lot in costume. What if everyone wearing a team is doing it as a costume to be ironic and nobody realizes it
  8. Sir please don't ride your razor scooter in here
  9. Dear woman in jeans and white ankle warmers: stop glaring at the guy in the down jacket, he can rock it
  10. Look left: woman with salad. Look right: bloody woman dressed as zombie eating graham crackers