No particular order chronologically or of hilarity.
  1. "That thing had nine lives, it just blew every one of them."
  2. "Can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead?"
  3. "We don't eat them anymore, we heard squirrels were high in cholesterol."
  4. "Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where's the Tylenol?"
  5. "Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, kiss my ass. Kiss his ass. Kiss your ass. Happy Hanukkah"
  6. "Every time Catherine revved up the microwave, I'd piss my pants and forget who I was for about half an hour or so."
  7. "We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny fucking Kaye."