HOBBIES TO TAKE UP/SKILLS TO LEARN AS A FOR REAL GROWN-UP ADULT
All the things I wish I'd learned but never did ... and never will now that this list has provided false validation. *Crosses off each item slowly and with flourish.
- •Learn SpanishNamely for watching Jane the Virgin and refining a killer Sophia Vergara impression.
- •Learn physicsYou can't go wrong with basic knowledge of the workings of the universe. Also, I'd like to destroy all the young white male writers and their sci-fi/no-it's-not-like-The-Matrix-you-don't-get-it screenplays.
- •Take dance classesThe middle schooler in me yearns for the days of opaque tan tights, sweaty shoes that curl into rotten twists of leather, and homosexual instructors named Cecil that rocked the town of Lawton, Oklahoma with his patented "shampoo" dance move.
- •Learn to play drumsIn lieu of therapy.
- •Keep more listsAs if I could.