THINGS THAT UNSOOTHE ME

  1. Shakeys
  2. Top knots
  3. The fact that my favorite coconut water is 6 dollars
  4. The drought
  5. NYC
  6. Passive aggressive jay walkers
  7. Having to wait a year for more Broad City
  8. That therapy isn't free
  9. That nobody is reading this list
  10. Being vomited on
  11. Team Sports
  12. Excessive balloons
  13. Certain pop stars
  14. That I can't rock fringe
  15. Dr. Lancer
  16. That I haven't made an app
  17. The word "marm"
  18. That this list could literally never end
  19. Facing people on trains
  20. Panini journeys (gross)
  21. That smell subway pumps in front of its stores
  22. My mom's freezer
  23. Nutrition facts on water
  24. That good tequila is impossible to find in the majority of the world and when you do, it's 100x the price
  25. Losing Chapstick everyday
  26. Needing Chapstick everyday
  27. My neck pillow collection
  28. "Recycling" jk! I love recycling !!!!!!
  29. Canadian geese
  30. Your cat
  31. The word "fleek"
  32. Hot yoga
  33. Creamer
  34. When parents put bows on newborns so you KNOW it's a girl
  35. New mothers
  36. Cupcake stores
  37. Cannibalism
  38. Chocolate covered raisins
  39. MOMA
  40. Best burrito debates
  41. Corn nuts
  42. Salvation
  43. Damnation
  44. Lines to get in lines
  45. When shaq wears a crown
  46. Love you shaq
  47. Earnest lists
  48. Motivational lists
  49. Mayo in sushi
  50. Tampa
  51. Austin Powers impersonations and the movie
  52. Mist