MY THEMEPARK ATTRACTIONS (JOHN WORLD) 🎢

  1. Taco Train
    You ride a street car slowly through the streets of Mexico City. The smell of slow smoked meats and fresh grilled tortillas wafts through the air. Its a safe place to practice your spanish, but english works in a pinch. When you see a taco purveyor of interest you hop off and eat a taco then hop back on and find your next taco.
  2. Haunted Europe
    Without going into all of the details, its like a typical vacation to Europe only the whole place is haunted.
  3. Hot Chicks Room
    The same one from the episode of Upright Citizens Brigade.
  4. Festival Fiasco
    Every type of outdoor festival rolled into one. We're talking ren fairs, blues and bbq, oktoberfests, art walks, Woodstock, pagan stuff, small town parades, you name it.
  5. Road Trip
    You and your group drive through a maze of fjords, savannahs, farm land, ranches, mountain roads, scenic coastal stretches, old growth forests, mongolia, snow scapes, tunnels, desert dunes, tropical paradise, and well, you get the idea. You choose the music, vehicle, and recreational drugs. You are the only vehicle on the road.
  6. Puppy Paradise
    You are laying on your back and hundreds of puppies climb over you and lick your face.
  7. Bicycle Coaster
    You start at the top of a mountain and coast down at a consistent four percent grade so no pedaling or braking is required to maintain a casual twelve miles per hour. Each bike in your group is equipped with the riders favorite beverage and some single handed snacks. The route curves and meanders down along a river with scenic overlooks, and the coasting lasts for forty-five minutes. Rabbit and fox run along side you with birds flying above and singing. The road is smoother than a baby's bottom.
  8. Beast Feast
    Its set in a medieval castle banquet hall. Candle lit with a grand hearth. Lots of antlers. Every type of wild animal is on the menu and experty prepared by French chefs. There is of course wine and all the fixings. Entertainment is provided by jesters and minstrels. After dinner everyone goes wassailing through the village.
  9. Water World
    It consists of muliple rides: a picturesque mountain river swimming hole, a pristine lake under your choice of moonlight or stars for skinny dipping, natural hotsprings overlooking the sea, an uncharted island with all the great beaches of the world, luaus, lobstah rolls, waterfalls, cliff jumping into hidden pools, slow river tubing, white water rafting, Kevin Costner, sea caves, sea life, buried treasure (with maps), and more swim up bars than you could ever imagine is possible.
  10. The Flume
    Its a classic flume ride, but also the best flume ride known to man.
  11. Nature Spa
    Everything you would find in a world class spa only its 100% supplied by nature, including: mud pools, steam caves, hot springs, riverside napping, wild bonobo massage, fresh spring water, tree ripened fruits and foraged veggies.
  12. House Party
    The best house party of the year every weekday of the year. Friday nights are house concerts. Costume party every Saturday. Pool parties on Sunday.
  13. Sporting Event
    Choose your event, choose your seats, choose your vendors, choose your outcome, but pro tip, tell them to "surprise you".
  14. Billionaire Bingo
    You play bingo against eight hundred octogenerians. Whomever wins is awarded eight billion dollars.
  15. Frisbee Field
    A big open field where you play frisbee with a bunch of super friendly hippie types you haven't met before. Everyone is the exact same skill level as you.
  16. Chocolate Town
    Let your imagination run wild because this attraction has every chocolate fantasy you could dream up.