OCCASIONS ON WHICH MY MOM BELIEVES TO HAVE SPOTTED KEVIN COSTNER

Side note: When I was growing up my mom had a Dances with Wolves poster hanging in the laundry room.
  1. 2002 PGA Championship
    They were watching from opposite sides of the fairway. A thunderstorm broke out causing everyone to scatter and then huddle together under the trees. Afterwards he was no where to be found, but it was later confirmed that he was in attendance.
  2. Whole Foods in Sedona
    He was pulling out of the parking lot in a convertible with a collie in the passenger seat. She followed. Pursuing him all the way to Cottonwood before remembering she had to pick up my sister Eileen from her astrology chart reading.
  3. At a Hillary Clinton rally
    He was wearing shades and walking alongside Clinton's entourage, but he wasn't smiling or shaking hands. He looked in my mom's direction and the corner of his lip curled and a dimple appeared briefly alongside his cheek bone.
  4. Hanging laundry in the backyard
    It was a balmy and breezy late afternoon. The sun was casting long shadows. She was hanging the bedding out to air in the blooming lilacs. The wind picked up and sheets started sailing. For a split second she saw Kevin dressed in plain farmer clothing standing at the edge of the corn field. Then just like that, he was gone.
  5. Her granddaughter's high school play
    Kevin was sitting ten rows up from her. He stayed in his seat during intermission, and after the play she couldn't find him. She suspects he went out through the fire exit.
  6. At the lake cabin
    Her and my dad were cruising the lake shore on a pontoon boat. Kevin and a couple of "babes" came swooping by on their jet skis and sprayed a big wall of water at them, some of which landed in my dad's scotch.
  7. After years of intensive research, she thinks there may be a link between Kevin's Great Uncle Sean and her Great Great Grandmother Margaret. She enrolled in a microfiche class at the local community college to continue her research.