THE TIME "JESSE BUTTERS" TURNED ME INTO A 13-YEAR-OLD FANGIRL

In Kauai. As always, with my sister.
  1. We saw our share of B and C list celebs in Kauai.
  2. This guy, Jordan Bridges.
    He looks like Fonzie here but he's on Rizzoli & Isles.
  3. I had a small mental freakout but didn't say anything to draw attention to him, and he did nothing to draw attention to my tantruming 2 year old
    Other than act impressed when a server rewarded her bad behavior with a chocolate bar. Ha! Joke's on them, my 2 yo hates chocolate.
  4. My husband and my 2 BILs saw Kevin Nealon out jogging.
    It took two days and 80 google searches to figure out his name. "He's tall and has brown hair and is in comedies!"
  5. Then came the big kahuna, Jesse L. Martin.
    Wearing this very outfit, I do believe.
  6. My sister's husband came in while I was waiting in line for my 17th shaved ice.
  7. "She said to tell you she saw Jesse Butters…?" he said.
  8. I knew immediately who she meant.
  9. Jesse L Martin aka Dr. Butters on Ally McBeal.
    Forget Rent! Law & Order! Forget The Flash! Allllyyyy McBeaaaaallll!!!
  10. I raced outside to my sister and confirmed that yes, it was him and yes, he is just as attractive in person as he is on TV.
    "He walked by like he expected to be recognized, so I think it's him," she speculated.
  11. So we did what any set of sisters would do.
  12. We got up and tailed him.
  13. I'm feeling a little breathless writing this.
  14. We crossed the street into a vendor's market and there he was!
  15. We walked by and I got up the nerve to smile at him.
    I'm sure I was very alluring.
  16. Then we slipped into a booth nearby and waited it out.
  17. Until he walked into our same.booth.
  18. Trapped in a booth with Dr. Butters!
  19. And we didn't say a word.
  20. I was having palpitations by then and was also a little mortified by my behavior and general appearance.
  21. It was cold that night and so instead of wearing just my cute sundress I was also wearing my husband's huge, ugly, long-sleeved gray North Face shirt.
  22. We pretended to be interested in some beautiful and very expensive necklaces.
  23. Dr. Butters finally left the booth and so did we and we giggled all the way back to our husbands.
  24. We took a moment to collect ourselves before arriving as to not appear flustered.
  25. Which we were.
  26. Did I mention that my sister and I are both married?
  27. We saw Dr. Butters again later, getting into his whip with his friends and my sister blew him a kiss to which he did not respond.
  28. We're assuming he just didn't see her.
  29. And that is what happens to two sisters when they are in gorgeous Kauai and have had Dr. Butters fever for the last 15+ years.