BURNING* QUESTIONS

*predominantly unimportant, but afflicting nonetheless
  1. Why isn't there a more effective way to make red wine in film/tv look like actual red wine?
    As a society, I feel like we can do better than cranberry juice.
  2. Why does Strip Mall Christianity exist?
    Beige stucco consumer huts sandwiched betwixt MattressFirm and TCBY make me viscerally uncomfortable.
  3. Who do people put Mac stickers on their cars?
    This is commodity fetishism at its finest (thank you for this term, @sswyryt)
  4. Why is unnecessary vowel substitution in names a thing?
    I'm looking at you, Ashlee and Carli.
  5. How did 50 Shades ever become a phenomenon?
    There is far superior erotic art out there in the world.
  6. Why do people still wear t-shirts that use phrases like"YOLO" un-inronically?
    Please exit the gene pool at the shallow end.