After taking multiple online quizzes to determine my ideal stripper name (and being supremely underwhelmed by the results), I've created a few formulas to yield more favorable outputs.
  1. alcoholic beverage of choice + least favorite national holiday
    Whiskey Valentine
  2. macaron flavor preference + animal of which you are most irrationally afraid
    Lavender Fox
  3. most effortlessly fashionable Disney princess + preferred time of day to read the newspaper
    Esmeralda Dawn
  4. least expensive type of apples at the market+ bedroom wall color
    Ambrosia Dove
  5. favorite thing to spread on toast + second favorite thing to spread on toast
    Honey Margarine
  6. pop tart flavor preference + meat selection at chipotle
    Strawberry Barbacoa
  7. least terrible song by The Kinks + worst month to have a picnic in Arizona
    Lola June