THINGS I'D RATHER BE DOING THAN STUDYING FOR MY MCAT
- •Attending Bible Study at a MegaChurch
- •Watching re-runs of Grease Live™
- •Sleeping on a mattress made of cacti
- •Eating microwave cake from a burlap-wrapped mason jar at some boho chic wedding
- •Discussing Infinite Jest with some asshole who just graduated from Swarthmore with a B.A. in English Lit
- •Listening to people drone on about "native landscapes"
- •Pretending to laugh at bad stand-up on a first date