~according to 30 Rock~
  1. Tube sock filled with bird seed
  2. "Katie Couric Sucks" wall graffiti, drawn in Sharpie
  3. Lamp covered in silk ties
  4. Empty pizza boxes (3)
  5. Blender half-filled with orange mystery liquid
  6. Bouquet of wilted peonies
  7. Pair of boxers with a hard-boiled egg in the crotch pocket
  8. Head of romaine lettuce
  9. Pile of crumpled newspapers
  10. Stack of artificial sweetener (sweet n low, specifically)
  11. Dead plant
  12. Corn Puffs™ puffed rice cereal, spilled and crushed into the carpet
  13. Half-drunk blood orange Cosmo
  14. Recycling bin, tipped over and filled with Bed, Bath, and Beyond coupons
  15. Large amorphous wall stain, presumably red wine
  16. Stuffed panda
  17. Wilson football
  18. Assorted near-empty liquor bottles (Grey Goose, Jose Cuervo, Jack Daniels)
  19. Large Cheese Pizza, stuffed into air duct
  20. Tasteful collection of black-and-white photography