A Woman's Train of Thought When She Is Late
It's irrational, but we've all been there...
- •Oh shit. I'm a day late. I'm definitely pregnant.
- •But I've been really stressed out lately, right? That has to be why.
- •Fuck. I'm definitely pregnant.
- •But I have a new coworker so we're probably just syncing up.
- •Damn. I'm fucking pregnant.
- •I know it's after Labor Day, but if I wear a pair of white pants today, it's definitely gonna come.
- •HOW DID THAT NOT WORK????? FML THERE'S NO WAY I'M NOT PREGNANT.
- •I swear I'm gonna kill this man for doing this to me. I know it takes two but I'm allowed to be totally irrational right now because the fucker got me pregnant!
- •Wakes up in the middle of the night....
- •Next day: ugh. I wouldn't have to deal with this shit if I were pregnant.