THINGS MY BOYFRIEND HAS DONE SINCE IVE BEEN SICK

  1. Slept on the couch
  2. Implemented and enforced a strict no skin to skin contact rule
  3. Strongly considered cutting a hole in a sheet to have sex without breaking the aforementioned rule
  4. Wrapped himself up like a burrito and told me I was allowed to touch him through the sheet
  5. Impressively evaded my touch when I've forgotten the rules
  6. Gotten visibly upset when I've coughed/blown my nose anywhere in his vicinity
  7. Refused to kiss me (obviously)