APOLOGIES I HOPE TO HAVE TO GIVE ONE DAY

I hope to live a life reckless enough that I will, at some point, be expected to give the following apologies
  1. "Sorry for playing Public Enemy at your rehearsal dinner"
  2. "Sorry for making the baptism all about me. You're right, it is mostly about your baby."
  3. "Sorry for getting us thrown out of Anthropologie again."
  4. "Sorry, I didn't realize the funeral was invite only."
  5. "Sorry, but in my defense: the pamphlet did NOT make it sound like a cult"
  6. "Sorry for eating off your plate, Joe Biden."
  7. "Sorry for talking too much about Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson on our last date."
    This one actually happened